Q: What is the difference between your wife and your job? A: After five years your job still sucks. Q: What do you call a man who cries while he pleasures himself? A: A tearjerker.
Some fruity lines from rude comedians:
Oh come on, you can admit it. Not all jokes need to be family friendly and G-rated. Some of the most beautifully crafted, genuinely laugh-out-loud adult dirty jokes are so jaw-droppingly filthy that you'd feel a little weird even sharing them with a consenting adult at a bar after midnight. But share them we must, because there's something about repeating raunchy jokes that make us feel more alive. It's the same adrenaline rush you get from riding a roller coaster. You scream with terror even though you know you're perfectly safe.
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“Sex is like playing Bridge – if you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand"
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex. What do you get when you do that? A family is at the dinner table. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.
The material that is presented here is for adults only. If you have not reached the age of majority, close it immediately, please! Well, honestly, we understand that it is too interesting for you, our dear readers, to leave this page just because of your age. Curiosity is not a sin, it makes us go forward and develop our intelligence. We cannot say that the dirty and weird puns we want you to see today will improve your smartness, but it will certainly cheer you up and will give you the material to use in parties and in groups of your friends. We have picked the best adult jokes for you and hope you will enjoy the reading! Take your time, as some anecdotes are presented in form of full stories, but we hope you will familiarize yourself with all of them, as we tried to do our best to collect these funny things.